Is Your Presence Fractured?
The average American spends over five hours a day on their phone. What’s left for presence?
We don’t have a shortage of attention—we have a shortage of presence.
In an AI-first, always-on world, presence isn’t a luxury. It’s a lifeline. It’s the human code we come back to when everything else pulls us away.
We check our phones without thinking. We scroll feeds without noticing. We respond to notifications mid-conversation. And then we wonder why we feel fragmented, disconnected, behind.
I’m not here to tell you to quit technology. I’d be a hypocrite if I did. I use my phone constantly—for work, for writing, for building, for creating. But I’ve also caught myself missing moments that mattered. I’ve fallen into the scroll when I meant to stay grounded. Just like everyone else.
The average American now spends over five hours a day on their phone. That may not sound like much—until you realize it adds up to almost a full day and half every week. Thirty-five hours, gone. That’s time we could’ve spent looking someone in the eye instead of watching their stories. Time we could’ve used to listen, to think, to connect.
Presence isn’t about guilt. It’s about self-awareness. And self-awareness is the starting point for real growth.
Just recently, someone newly married asked me for relationship advice. I’ve been married since 2001—coming up on twenty-four years. My advice was simple: Show up. Be present.
That’s the real work of a relationship. Not always the big gestures—but the everyday attunement. It’s noticing when your partner needs you, and being there without being asked. And you can’t do that if your head is in your phone.
Presence is what turns time into connection. It’s what keeps trust alive. It’s what makes love visible.
That’s why The Code of Presence is the foundation of The More Effect. Because without presence, none of the other codes work. You can’t build momentum in chaos. You can’t create connection through distraction. You can’t see possibility if your vision is clouded by noise.
Presence isn’t passive. It’s active. It’s a choice. And it’s available in the same moment you reach for your phone.
So this week, consider: What if you gave your presence the same attention you give your phone?
What if, as easily as you open Instagram or email, you opened a moment of stillness?
What if you gave someone your full attention—not because they demanded it, but because they deserved it?
And what if you offered yourself that same gift?
Not perfection. Not performance.
Just presence.
That’s where more begins.
To close, I want to be clear. I’m not preaching.
Sometimes writing these articles feels like journaling. I struggle with presence too. I often find myself deep in thought—on my phone or not—and missing the moments right in front of me.
With writing, I’m able to think through my thoughts to help my own personal self-development and showing up.
I don’t write them because I’ve figured it all out. I write them because I’m still figuring it out—just like you.
Being more present in all phases of my life is something I’m working on. The more I pay attention to it, the more I see how much it matters.
And I hope this gave you something to think about as you step into your week—with a little more clarity, and a little more presence.
In terms of my physical presence, this week I’ll be in Memphis at the Chief Experience Officer Exchange, speaking on a panel (CHIEF CHAT: The Future of Experience) and connecting with other CX leaders who are also thinking about what it means to be present in an AI-driven world. If you’ll be there, let’s find a moment to be fully present—together.
Your Reflection Prompts For The Week
- If your presence feels fractured – at home or work – what one thing could you do to make it feel less so?
- When do you feel most present—and what helps you get there?
- Where does your attention go when you’re overwhelmed or distracted?
- What would it look like to reclaim one hour this week and give it fully—to someone else, or to yourself?
About Jeremy
Jeremy Victor is a father, coach, and senior executive in the digital health industry. He writes about leadership, emotional intelligence, and the modernization of work in the AI-first, always-on economy. His mission: help people—and the systems they work in—Become More. Join Jeremy online at his Substack: Business at the Speed of AI, LinkedIn, Instagram, and TikTok, OneMORE Minute.