The Connection Code
The road to More starts with one warm look, two curious words, and a small act of help
Helping every moment become more.
Las Vegas, HLTH Conference, October 2024. I decided to run a small experiment: could one gentle smile start a chain reaction of help inside a cavernous expo hall? My only rule for the week was simple—every time I made eye contact, I smiled first, asked “Tell me…,” and then offered one small act of service before we parted.
Three days later, spending significant time outside of my comfort zone (by nature I feel safest as an introvert) I met at least a hundred people and a few with whom in a few minutes of conversation a friendship developed. What I learned was not new, but it was newly confirmed: connection compounds, and it begins with three human moves anyone can master.
Rick and Terry (two of my mentors) taught me the idea; Zig Ziglar had etched it in stone:
“You can get everything you want in life,
if you just help enough other people
get what they want.”
That single sentence runs under everything you are about to read. It is also the heart of The More Effect. We endure—and thrive—by choosing to become more for one another.
I call the practice The Connection Code. Three micro‑behaviors, executed in order, transform ordinary exchanges into shared progress, helping moments become more.
The Path To Connection
I’ve found that today, when we stare at our phones nearly five-hours a day, humans are increasingly self absorbed. The pandemic has altered our nature, making us more isolated and guarded. Loneliness and isolation have become quiet causes of sadness and depression. But as social creatures, humans need connection.
Even just a fleeting two-three minute unexpected conversation can shift one’s day. After some experimentation in expo halls, restaurants, trains, I landed on a simple formula for making connections.
Kindness -> Curiosity -> Generosity
1 | Kindness
The fastest path to kindness is soft eye contact with a gentle smile.
A warm look says, I see you; you’re safe here.
Neuroscience tells us that eye contact lowers cortisol and opens the social learning centres of the brain. In practice it does something simpler: it disarms hurry. Whether you are greeting an employee or a barista, meet eyes first, smile second, speak third.
Reading this moment for openness is essential, as not every moment is ready for more.
You’ll know when it is.
2 | Curiosity
With the unspoken agreement found in a shared smile, become curious. The easiest way starts with two simple words: “Tell me…”
- Tell me, where are you heading?
- Tell me, where are you from?
- Tell me, who do you work for? What do you do?
- Tell me, where did you go to college?
- Tell me, what has you most interested at this event?
Curiosity suspends judgement and invites story.
3 | Generosity
Your intentional presence and attention are the first gifts you give the moment through active listening. Listen with intent to serve, to help the moment become more for the other person.
Within minutes a shared thread may emerge; an experience, a location, a person, an event, a podcast. Follow that thread and it will reveal what the moment needs you to give. You’re not seeking anything profound, a simple act of generosity is enough. If you just help enough other people get what they want … everything happens for a reason.
And if nothing obvious emerges, it’s possible the only thing the moment needed was your full attention.
Connection rarely ends with a handshake; it leaves a remnant of possibility. Sometimes it sparks an immediate collaboration; other times it just lightens a stranger’s load. Either way, the Connection Code ensures you leave people better than you found them—and that is how the More Effect scales, encounter by encounter.
Every act of seeing, asking, and offering widens connection and proves that more is available—right here, right now.
Putting the Code to Work
Connection isn’t a talent; it’s a choice.
Kindness opens the door, Curiosity invites the story, and Generosity carries it forward.
From Moments to More
Practiced in sequence, these small acts turn ordinary moments into something more. That’s the More Effect.
Connection doesn’t require charisma or grand gestures, just intent. A warm glance, two curious words, and one act of help reset the energy of any interaction. Use the Code of Connection in hallways, video calls, and coffee lines. You’ll experience moments feeling instantly different and better … becoming more.
In an AI-first, always-on world, the Code of Connection simplifies and amplifies human connection. Each tiny deposit proves that more is available right now, transforming chance encounters—and even your closest relationships—into fresh possibility.
Reflective Prompts
- Lift List: This week, where could a quick intro, resource, or note lighten someone else’s load?
- Smile Audit: When did someone’s warm glance last melt your guard?
- Story Hunt: Whose perspective have you only half-heard? What could “Tell me…” reveal?
About Jeremy
Jeremy Victor is a father, coach, and senior executive in the digital health industry. He writes about leadership, emotional intelligence, and the modernization of work in the AI-first, always-on economy. His mission: help people—and the systems they work in—Become More. Join Jeremy online at his Substack: Business at the Speed of AI, LinkedIn, Instagram, and TikTok, OneMORE Minute.